Precious Caleb...

May your new wings take you to the places you've always dreamed of

We love you

This years Top Ten...

Cutest baby ever...

Biggest belly ever....

Happiest couple ever...

Worst picture ever...

Prettiest little girl ever...

Bestest sisters ever....

Proudest parents ever...

Coolest miracle ever...

Coolest dad ever....

Best mom ever....

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the big two three

(To the tune of Happy Birthday)

Happy birthday to me

I've turned twenty-three

I feel so much older........

Today I very slowly, tired and grumpy rolled out of bed a whoppin' 23. I grumbled down the stairs with a nice glowing frown on my face and made myself some coffee, but not before I spilled the bowl of sugar all over the inside of the cupboard.

I look at my life and my walk, and it doesn't seem to match up with the number. I look at "23" and think, that's it? I'm such a child. It was only 3 years ago that I stepped out of teenagehood, that isn't that far back.

But I am blessed, beyond belief. God has given me more than I ever dreamed, I can not imagine where I would be if He hadn't plucked me out of the hole I was trapped in. He's been reminding me more and more everyday, that I have nothing to get here, it has only been by His grace and mercy. I forget so easily...

Finish up that last line in the song for me, and share in my birthday fun.

Be blessed today

update

There are some things stirring in my heart.... am not sure what God is going to do with it all once I get it, is it just for me? is it to encourage others? It's amazing to know that God loves me too much to leave me stagnant, even when that's exactly how I want to be left. God has blessed my life more than I could possibly describe, but I've been finding my refuge in those blessings. I've gotten myself a little too comfortable, but He's gently nudging me back on track.

Things around here seem to be getting more and more normal each day. I've been doing ok with keeping the house clean, although I'm finding it much more difficult with a baby that feeds every three hours, two 'living rooms' and a whole extra bedroom, but I'm managing. My hubby is such a big help, have no idea what our house would look like if he didn't serve me in that area.

My little girl is loving school. She now takes the bus in the mornings, as her mom is now at ease with her leaving. They've been learning about the seven days of creation in class, and the story of Adam and Eve. It's such a blessing to have her come home and tell me that she learned something new from the word of God, and not the newest kid slang for a cuss word.

Little Daniel is growing and changing everyday. He's awake for two or three periods durring the day, and is sleeping a bit better. He's still up every three hours to feed, but he used to take a while to get back to sleep after a feed, now at least he doesn't lay there grunting and squirming for an hour. My body is very slowly getting used to the fact that I am not able to give it as much sleep. I should be napping durring the day, but I find there's always something else to do. I had a nice nap today, so I'm good for a few days.

My little Faithfulness came over today. She's so smart. I love just watching her little mind at work, watching her think about something. Even when she tests me, I find it so neat, just to see how much she really does know. I hate it when people have the attitude that kids don't know anything. I think they just use it as an excuse for why their kids don't listen to them. "Oh they don't know any better".....they sure do guys!

Well I'm off to bath my CHILDREN. Blessings :)

Let's take it from the top...

On our way to the hospital, already looking forward to my epidural

Dropping the little one off at Kukum and Mushums

This is not fun dude.....

labor........

labor......

labor....

(and an epidural that didn't work)

and voila!

WELCOME TO THE WORLD BUDDY!

and baby makes FOUR!

awwww......

cuddles with big sister

Whoa!!!!!

Napping with Daddy

Bright eyed and bushy tailed

hmmmmm........

On cloud nine

Peace out

Blogrrrrrr!.com

Grrrr.....
After many requests, I've been trying to post some pics for you of the newest member of my family. But stupid Blogger won't let me. So bare with me, they are coming....

Once an addict always an addict....

Hi, I'm Nin, and I'm a coffee-addict.

I'm sad and ashamed to say that I am once again addicted to my drug of choice, caffeine. Doesn't take long for a recovering addict, a few hits of the good stuff for a few days in a row and you're back on the addiction rollercoaster of headaches and daily fatigue. I should've just said no....

I did well throughout the pregnancy. My hubby was gentle in weening me off the juice just prior to getting pregnant. He started by adding a little bit of half-caf to my coffee in the mornings, then eventually it was all half-caf. He then added decaf into my half caf, until eventually it was all decaf, and voila, my body couldn't even tell the difference. I enjoyed a cup of the real stuff here and there as a treat, like most normal people do, but that was where it stayed. But as soon as I was no longer pregnant, and no longer breast-feeding, I went overboard. I have fallen off the wagon. What do I have to show for it all? A splitting headache in the morning that will last all day, that only a shot of the enemy that got me into this mess can conquer. Tylenol is no match for the caffeine headache, any coffee addict can attest to that.

So what do I do? Does my future hold infinite headaches? Grumpy mornings? Sleepy days? Possibly panhandling to support my addiction?

Time will tell.... They say the addict has to hate their sin...

But I love that bean

update

Thank-you all for your many thoughts and prayers! I am happy to say we are all doing very well over here. I feel quite normal again (if I ever was very normal), and it's nice to be able to get out and show the little man off to the world. I forgot how much attention a baby got in public, to the point where sometimes you wonder when the gazing strangers are actually going to move on with whatever they were doing before they started gooing and gaing over your baby. Ok already....take care now, bye bye then. But it's so fun, I love that little something inside of every baby that screams of God's beautiful creation, that draws the world in no matter how big or small they are themselves. Everybody loves babies, it reminds us of our heavenly Father, whether we know Him or not.
My back problem was black and white the day baby was born. It's still a problem, but it's more in the backround than anything. I can lay on my back again, and while I still get up a little sore, it's nothing compared to how it was feeling before. Now that I'm able to move more freely and lay on my back, I'm able to do the excersies my physio therapist gave me way back when.
My daughter has already listed all the things she's been patiently waiting for through out the pregnancy. "Mommy we can bath together now! Mommy you can jump and run now! Mommy we can play hide and seek!" What a precious gem, she has been so good through this whole thing. A lot of kids would be very demanding, maybe jealous or upset with having to miss out on things. But my princess has been so amazing, and she deserves all the blessings of being a big sister.
My hubby has been incredible. I had no idea it would be so hard at first, and have no idea what I would've done without him. I cried many times apologizing that he had to come home from the hospital with two babies. Seeing him serve me in everything, and be completely supportive and nurturing to me, while I have nurtured our son, it has been the most amazing experience. My hubby wasn't even able to be downstairs, that was too far away. I needed him by my side at all times. It's been an amazing to experience this with my husband, to be blessed with a strong marriage, to now see all the things that God desires for those who have children. We're not equipped to go it alone, I see that more than I ever have. I was a "single-mom" with my daughter, but I always had the love and support of my family, my mom stepped in and was a mom for both of us. But there are young girls out there who have no one. When those hormone levels come crashing down and the 'baby blues' surface, how do they make it? Through this pregnancy and postpartum, my husband has probably seen me cry more than everyone else put together in his whole life. Through it all my hubby and I are closer to eachother....I wonder if that's one reason why God sends your emotions on a ride....
Well I'm off to clean the house that has slowly but very surely become a bomb, and to be a mommy to two beautiful CHILDREN. Blessings, God is good!

FINALLY!

Bright and early at 5:25 Tuesday morning, the Lord blessed us with a beautiful little boy!

Baby Daniel David

7lb 3oz

Perfect

Amazing

God blessed me with a very quick labor and delivery. I'm not sure if things could have gone more smoothly (although I wouldn't have minded some pain relief!). Daniel came out as healthy as could be, and was able to lay on my chest right away. He's the cutest thing I've ever seen, and am so proud to be his mom. My husband was able to announce the sex to me, and he did so with great joy. He was the one to name this little one, his first born son, what a blessing that was to wait in anticipation to hear the name that my husband had chosen. It's been an undescribable blessing to be parents of this little man that we created together.

Will post some pics soon. Have wanted to update you all many times in the last week, but have been finding it hard getting into the routine of being a new mom again. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. Be blessed, God is good.

Missing a former life...and ready for my new one

I could squat...

I could lean and bend...

I had nice pretty clothes to wear that fit....

I could sit cross legged....

I could dance....

I could paint my toe nails...

I could fit behind my father-in-laws air hockey table, along with other nooks and crannies....

As you can tell, I'm very ready to be done with what has been a very physically trying pregnancy. I'm ready to claim my body back as my own, and stop housing a roomate in a house that is clearly no longer big enough for the two of us. I'm starting to think that maybe I'm just not one of those women who love the being pregnant part of motherhood. I think I enjoy my physical freedom too much. Now that my sister is on the preggy boat, she's dropped off all the clothes that I lent her when I grew out of them. I look through the box and marvel at all these little trendy pants that I once wore. I'm getting very excited to look like me again, and do all that I was once able to do. With the light shinning brightly at the end of my tunnel, I will walk with my head up for these last few days, looking forward to all the blessings of bringing a new life into the world and meeting him or her for the first time. So until after the hatching of my little egg, I bid you farewell. Blessings!

finally a few pics!

Pre-living room...

My hubby's creation....

Pre-daughter's room...

My hubby's creation...

Many more to come....

My little one is in school today. Her and I packed up her lunch together last night. Chicken sandwich, baby carrots, granola bar, juice and bread sticks and cheese. We put it in a brown paper bag and she wrote her name on it. So cute. We went grocery shopping last night, and I bought her a bunch of little treats that I wouldn't normally allow her to have, like Pop Tarts and candy. My hubby told my daughter to soak it up while she could, because mommy needed to fill a void in herself by buying her all these treats. Sadly it's true, it does make me feel a little better while she's at school, at least she had her Pop Tart, now I can get on with my day.

Still feel like I'm getting bigger everyday, even though I know I'm not. But I've been feeling quite better emotionally and mentally. It's amazing what knowing the end is near will do for a person. Seeing that bright and shining light at the end of my tunnel is quickly getting me through the days. I'm getting so excited to have this baby. I'm fantisizing about what it will be like, about what kind of mom I'll be, about what kind of daddy my husband will be... It's all very exciting for all of us. I came home to a message on my machine last night from my mother in law. She wanted us to know that my husband's Nana is coming into town from B.C one weekend in October to see our new baby, and to make sure to keep that weekend open. It made me smile from ear to ear, and made me feel real special. When I stop to think about it, it's not very surprising that the great grandma would want to come and meet her first blood great grand child, I've just never experienced this side of having a baby before. With my daughter, I didn't have any inlaws, and since everything was very up in the air as to whether or not she was coming or going, staying or leaving, there weren't a lot of visitors. I feel very blessed to experience becoming a parent as God intended. Many people must take these little things for granted, but I've been feeling so grateful for it all. My mother in law mentioned that she wasn't going to be going to the lake anymore until the baby was born. I felt so loved.... Like, duh, her son is having a baby, of course she's not going anywhere, but to me, I don't know, it's just so nice to know that there's all this family gathered around this new little one, ready to love it as soon as it comes. I love how God will bless us when we walk in obedience. It's unfortunate that so often we choose to walk in disobedience, and end up being robbed of so much because of it. And half the time we don't even know what we're missing, so we just carry on the same path, not knowing there is so much more, if we would just submit to Him. I'm so glad to have experienced all that I have, and that God brought me through, now I know how special this all is...

Well, that's about as much of an update as I can give you. I'm still cut off from the outside world of human beings. Anyone reading this is about as much contact as I have with the human race these days. But I'm enjoying the restful period, as I know it will all come crashing down once baby comes. For now just being with my daughter and hubby is enough to keep me going. Of course my neighborhood family fits in there somewhere as well, which has been such a blessing. You don't feel any more comfortable than you do with your own family. It's been nice having them around in this phase of anti socialism, I can always hang out with them and not feel like I have to do anything but just be. They've been very helpful too, my mom came over today and swept my kitchen and door way. Ah, to be a block away from your mommy.

~Blessings~

how well do you know me?

Had to get in on this one....

Check it out!

http://www.quizyourfriends.com/quizpage.php?quizname=060909221305-112914

another mission field

"Let the little children come unto me...."

-Jesus-

Today I sent my little on off for her first day of school. I shed a few tears as I watched the car drive away, but deep in my spirit I could hear the voice of God speaking peace and reassurance that she is in His hands, not mine.
It's been an amazing journey, releasing my daughter into God's hands, a journey that is far from over. Everyday is another day where I have to choose to let her go. I had many plans for my daughter, that have been burned up as an offering for the Lord. I had determined that it was God's plan, because I knew He wanted what was best for her, and I thought I had found out what that was. But God has been showing me more and more that the destiny of my child is far greater than I could see. By holding her back from the things I thought would harm her, I was holding her back from all that God wanted to do in her life, to raise her up as a leader and an evangelist for the King.
I'm still figuring all this out. It's so hard to be a parent in this day and age, because everyone seems to have the right answer, and if you're not falling under that answer or the new fad everyone seems to be following, you're doing it wrong. Let me reassure you that your child has a special destiny, one that has been determined by the Lord, not you, and not by all the opinions of others, thinking they know what's best. The Lord has singled out your child for something very special. He desires to see His glory shine in your childs life, and if you follow His lead, and raise them up in the way they should go, He will be glorified. He know's their name, the hairs on their heads are numbered, He will carry out His good works into completion, so that they will not be lacking anything.
Parents, be encouraged today, for God is raising up a generation of leaders, teachers, encouragers, prayer warriors, evangelists and prophets. These are your kids.

You know that very distinct difference between being the 'bride' and being a wife? I can remember everyone always asking me durring the months and weeks before our wedding, "So, how's 'the bride' feeling? How's 'the bride' holding up?" Seemed that after we got married I never heard any "How's the wife?" I guess the commotion at that point was just, over. So here I am, as pregnant as this little body is ever going to get, tired, heavy, irratated, emotional, anti-social, and every time I see the whites of anyone's eyes....."How's the preggy feeling?" Sigh, I'm ready for the comotion to be over, and to enter into the next stage, where no one really asks questions anymore, where people kind of just leave you alone. I want to enter mommy-hood.
I've hit this place where I just want to be within the four walls of my house and in the company of my husband. I dread the thought of being around a bunch of people, hearing the same old twenty questions that I don't want to answer anymore. Yes, I'm still pregnant. Yes, I'm getting very large. Yes, my back still bothers me. Yes, I'm very uncomfortable. No, I don't sleep very well. No, my hormone levels and emotions are not stable. No, I don't feel completely prepared for the coming of this baby but YES! I want it out.
Ahhhh, in the end, I just want to meet this little one. I want this little one to be comfortable in the new room my husband and I have created for it's arrival. I want to know if God blessed my little girl with a sister or a brother. I want to experience mommy-hood in the way God intended it within the holy grounds of marriage.
It's been difficult for me to see past the physical pains this pregnancy has come with. I've had times of feeling very selfish and less than, when I hear others who are pregnant count every moment as a blessing and a miracle. I feel jealous when I hear of others who feel great from day one to delivery day, and wonder why I was chosen to walk this road instead of that one. I know on the other side, there is a glorious road awaiting me, and anything that may have been taken from me now, will be given back tenfold, as my heavenly father has promised.
For now, my little body still endures the hardships of creating and bearing life inside it, and still excitingly awaits the day that my little one will bless me and my family with it's presence. Until then......the love of my Heavenly Father, the reassurance of my husband, the gentleness of my daughter, naps, a whole lot of kleenex and Tums..........it's all I need.

2 Baby updates

My baby at about 18 to 20 inches and 5 to 6 pounds, is looking plump and less wrinkly now as fat deposits fill out it's adorable form. Creases have formed around the baby's wrists and neck, and the dimples I'll soon be kissing have started to appear on the elbows and knees. With the uterine home now increasingly cramped, baby has little room for gymnastics, so I feel less vigorous kicking and more twisting and wiggling. Just like a newborn, my baby has regular periods of active sleep, deep sleep, active wakefulness and quiet wakefulness. Brain growth continues at a fantastic clip. Baby's lungs are approaching full maturity.

Am looking more and more forward to no longer being 'pregnant', and becoming a 'mommy' to this little one my husband and I have been blessed to create together. God continues to prepare me with the faith and trust that I will need to mother this child. The more I seek His perfect grace, the more I know my husband and I will be great parents. His faithfulness is enough to sustain my hopes and dreams, and His peace is enough to cover my fears and doubts.

A big congratulations to my daughter's dad and step-mom, who just had their new baby girl last night! My little girl is officially a big sister. If you feel lead, please keep them in your prayers. May God's blessing be on this new family, and may His love be revealed and received.

~Peace~

the house is still here, and I'm still in it

Am still looking around wondering how all my stuff found it's way into this house. I go to the bathroom and think, yep, that's my bath mat, that's my shower curtain, but who's bathroom is this? Yep that's my bed, my sheets, my dresser, and look, there's my clothes in that there closet, but who the hecks room is this? It's obviously still sinking in, that this is MY house. I'm not borrowing it, I'm not viewing it or testing it out, I'm not even renting it, it's mine. And there will be no strange person popping in at any time, asking us to please exit the premises, and give them back their house.
And it feels very weird, just knowing that my parents are around the corner, and my sister is down the street. They were both over today, for our first, neighborly visit. What a blessing it's going to bring to me and my family having them so close. I'm looking forward to all that God has in store.

First night

I'm about to spend my first night in my new house.
The move went so smoothly, and didn't take long at all. An hour to load up the truck, and only 45 minutes to unload. We were very blessed to have good help this morning, and they were all done before noon. Then the big pregnant and sore wife got to have a nice hour long nap, while my hubby worked hard at unpacking bits and pieces of our room, our bathroom, and the basement. Then through out the rest of the day and evening, we have had family members coming and going helping out with anything that was left. Thank you so much guys! My hubby cut and watered the front and back lawn already, as well and pulled all the weeds in the sidewalk, washed the whole outside of the house and pruned the heck out of the big pine tree in the front yard, not to mention all that he's been doing inside. He's been going hard, non-stop since 7 am this morning. I tried napping with his this afternoon but he wouldn't be quiet. He kept babbling on about all that he wants to do next. So I told him he might as well just get up and do it all, since he sure as heck wasn't capable of napping, or shutting up so that I could! I sure hope he sleeps tonight! Last night he was so excited that he didn't sleep at all. He kept poking me asking if I was awake. When the alarm went off at 6:50 I opened my eyes to see him grinning from ear to ear, so excited to start the day. So cute, of course I was not quite so enthused myself. It's been so awesome to watch him take everything on and get so much done, and to still have his complete blessing to take it easy and rest. I love him so much! But I'm off to bed, hopefully my hubby can join me, but he's still going hard upstairs. Hehe, "upstairs".....so weird.
Blessings!

So thankful for my hubby.....

I've been inspired by my sis to broadcast how amazing my hubby is, so here I go....

As many of you know, I am 35 weeks pregnant, and we're moving in one more sleep into our first home. People keep telling me that I'd better be taking it easy, and that I shouldn't be working too hard with this move. It's such a good reminder everytime I hear this, of how hard my hubby has been working to make it all easy on me. He's set up an amazingly organized packing system, so that when I'm at home ready to unpack, I won't have to search through any boxes to find something. He hasn't allowed me to lift a finger in regards to packing anything. All I've had to do is supervise, and let him know what he can throw out and what to pack. Everything is basically done, and he's done it all by himself! (minus the day that my brother-in-law and sis came to help us out, thank you so much!!) He works day and night, and has still managed to pack up our whole apartment, and keep his pregnant wife feeling loved and secure, babied and pampered. By the grace of God he's proven himself to be the most amazing husband I could ever ask for. His qualities are something to be admired, his hard work something that I look up to. It has been such a blessing to walk this out with him, and to have his blessing to take it easy on the sidelines. I can remember the day that I let go of the control of this move, and gave it over to my hubby, since that day the peace of God that passes all understanding has been filling me. It has been that peace that has brought us to the day before our move. We pray that His peace continues to be in the center of our hearts, as we watch the real work begin!

~peace~

3 sleeps!

Three more sleeps until my family and I pick up and move into our own house. I'm so amazed that God has brought us to this place, where we can experience the blessing of this new adventure together. Our apartment is no longer resembling any sort of home anymore. Boxes are lined up against all the walls, my daughter's loft bed is all disassembled, and there's one face cloth in the linen closet. Slowly but surely everything is finding it's way into a compact space to make it's way to the new house. My hubby and I are getting very excited, and can't stop talking about all the neat things we want to do as soon as we arrive. We plan to paint right away, and I can't wait! Having grown up in rental properties all my life, I've never seen anything but a white wall. Let me tell you, 22 years of built up and unused painting energy is going to make quite the statement. Stay tuned, I'll take lots of before and after pics!
Be blessed as you are, God is good, He is faithful and He is our provider.