Hi, I'm Nin, and I'm a clean freak.
I haven't always been this way, in fact, I used to be one of the people who kept her house in such a way, that the me that is now, would probably feel uncomfortable visiting.
Growing up, I had a mom, who when she was growing up, had no mom. My mom was forced to drop out of school in grade 5, and become the mom to her 5 brothers, and the keeper of the home. My mom had never in her life been tobogganing, until I was 7 years old, and my mom had never been swimming, or even worn a bathing suit until she was on her honeymoon. These are the types of things kids do, and since, my mom was never able to be a kid, she never did them.
So, when my mom had us girls, she decided, come hell or high water, she would never make us do what she had to do growing up. We got to be kids, everyday, all day, period.
This meant, no chores. Yes, you heard me, NO CHORES.
This backfired on my mom, when we grew up to be teenagers, who made various disgusting messes all over the house, who kept our bedrooms as pig sty's, and when asked to lift a finger to help, we refused. My mom would go so long in frustration, only to cave after hounding me over and over, and finally clean my bedroom. Yes, my mom cleaned my bedroom until the day I moved out.
As you can guess, moving out was a massive slap of reality smack dab in the face. My apartment was a BOMB, and I had NO idea how to clean it. I didn't have a dishwasher, and I would use literally every single dish in the entire kitchen (even soup ladles as spoons, and baking mixing bowls for cereal) was dirty. This meant, that when it was finally time to wash dishes, instead of it taking me 10 minutes, it took me 2 hours. I didn't know simple things like, you need to actually wash your kitchen sink because bacteria grows in there, or, you need to wash the grime off your tub otherwise your bathing in your own filth. I had never washed a floor, I had never cleaned a fridge or an oven, I had never organized a linen closet. In my first year on my own, I was on the phone with my mom and sis almost everyday, with the silliest of questions: "How do I wash my tub? How long do I let the oven cleaner sit? Can I use bleach on the inside of my fridge?"
It was a sad and painful journey, but eventually, I learned, I got it, and I loved it.
Through our years of marriage, I've learned that, the person who kept her apartment in complete chaos, mess and uncleanliness, just isn't me. The me I've come to know, likes clean, and likes it an awful lot. This last year of marriage, parenting, womanhood, Christianity, friendship and general life, has been hard, and verrrrrry slow moving. Many things in my life got completely put on hold, my housekeeping passion being just one of them. These last couple of months, for the first time in a year, I've felt like me again. I've been keeping my house in tiptop shape, just as I once loved. I've been having supper ready when if not before my husband gets home from work. I've been grocery shopping. I've been organizing. I've been me.
So, if you and this me that I speak of, have never actually met, please, allow me to introduce myself. Hi, I'm Nin, and I'm a clean freak. I like my house clean, and I like it an awful lot. I love finding little specks of dirt or grime on my white cupboards, specks that no one would ever notice except me, and I love the sense of accomplishment I feel when I wipe them away. I love washing my tub, and cleaning all the taps until they're all shiny and sparkly. I love the peace that I hope people feel when they walk into my living room, when there isn't crap laying all over the place and they don't know where to sit. I also love the beach and red wine. I'm pleased to meet you.
Even more than all that, I love that this is me. I love that I'm ok that this is me. I love that I'm free to break free from the mold that was set out for me. It's time to come out of the closet. That I'm anal, meticulous and very picky. That I don't like pet hair, dirt, mysterious sticky substances, and I hate the smell of moldy dishcloths. I also love the smell of Windex a little more than I should, but that's neither here nor there.
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that is so awesome!! I often find that people struggle with being themselves or wanting to be the person they used to be. It's so good that you went through a time of growth, missed some things about the way you used to be and now appreciate them so much more because of their absence. Also I'm sure without even realizing it you have left some of the things you didn't like behind.
ReplyDeleteBy the way I can relate to cleaning the little specks no one will notice. Or the grime in the littlest nicks and crannys that no one would clean. It feels good to clean those spots for some obsessive compulsive reason ha ha!!
I would be very excited if I ended up becoming a neat freak like you!! I would not consider myself dirty, but I do tend to leave clusters of clutter. Then again, I have not had my own place in a long time and thinking back to my place on 6th St. in Saskatoon, I kept that place super clean and tidy. And I loved it!!
ReplyDeleteNeat how you went from one extreme to the other. I like to be clean but yet I struggle to keep things organized. If someone could come organize and downsize for me then I think my place would be kept cleaner longer
ReplyDeleteHmmm.... wonder when this post was written!? HEE HEE!!
ReplyDeleteman, i so love cleaning too. its fabulous.
i'm glad to hear you're getting back to YOU. love it!