Monday, May 31, 2010


































In 6 days I will be celebrating my 6th anniversary with the love of my life. Every year around this time, I write an anniversary post, filled with all that we've learned over the years, and thoughts of how encouraged and blessed I am that things used to be so hard, and now, are so easy. That would be my normal and traditional anniversary post....
But guess what? I've discovered a gem in the last year. I'm NOT normal. And neither is my husband. We're freaks, we're ridiculous, and yes, our marriage is hard. But we're still completely and utterly in love with each other, in fact, more than ever.
Instead of my long "we are perfect for each other" list, here's a glimpse of what life really looks like:

-We eat copious amounts of food at night. Probably the equivalent of 3 meals in one. A night where we don't go to bed mumbling the words "my tummy hurts me", where then the other replies "dude....I know." is considered an "off-night".

-I love to pick the skin off around my nails, and by pick the skin off, I mean, pick until I see blood. After a bad day, Chris came and sat down beside me while I sat in silence, picking away. He offered me his hand, to which, I gladly accepted. He then spent the next week complaining about the massively deep hangnail I gave him. He has since not offered me his hand on a bad day.

-I've developed a foreign morning language, and my husband has developed the gift of interpretation. It's called 'grunting'. Two grunts for "coffee" and four grunts for "what time is it". We plan on continuing to expand the language, to the point where we won't have to speak english ever again.

-My husband twitches in his sleep, and by twitches, I mean convulses, seizures and completely shakes the bed. For the most part I've learned to live with it, although, there have been nights where I've woken him with savage "love-taps", followed with, DUUUUDE!!! WOULD YOU JUST SLEEP STILL!!!!!

-Some couples have nice cutesy nicknames for each other, like sweetums or shmootsie. My husband and I on the other hand, refer to each other as 'DUDE'. We just find it easier, being only one syllable and all.

-I'm very easily scared. At least three times a week my husband will scare the crap out of me by doing one of the following: simply walking into a room, falling down (or up) the stairs when he's trying to be elastic man, or, my personal favorite, a sneeze, which are so loud you could hear it from across the street. I've learned to be loving in knowing that it's not his fault, by only getting mad at him occasionally.

-One day about a year ago, while putting away the dishes, I found a small little plastic toy gorilla sitting on the top shelf of the cupboard, having no idea where it came from or how it got there. Since then, Chris and I take turns placing said gorilla all over our house, to which the other finds him in their shoe, pocket, a plant, or my personal favorite, at the bottom of my coffee cup (note: being easily scared, when I first saw something black and floating in the bottom of my coffee, I thought it was a bug and screamed. Of course, I called Chris to A: give him poop for scaring me, and B: give him kudos on the awesome hiding spot that I have yet to beat.)

-Sometimes each of us like to take turns enjoying the sound of our own voices, and sometimes, all that really matters is having the other one there hearing, but not necessarily listening. More than half the time, we tell each other things, and watch the hearer nod and say yes, only to bring it up a week later, and hear that same hearer say a brain-dead expressionless "HUH?"
(P.S. My hubby went out today, and before leaving asked me to turn the sprinklers off in a few minutes. When he arrived back home an hour later, he found me writing this blog post, and made note that the sprinklers were still on.)

-We recently went through a phase of watching every single episode of Seinfeld, from start to finish (180 episodes). We've now replaced that obsession with watching every single episode of The Office. Many times we watch it in bed, planning on only watching one or two episodes, which leads to 4 or 5, which leads to 2am, on a work day.

In conclusion to my ridiculous list of idiosyncrasies, we don't have all the answers. Half the time, we're scrambling to find just one answer. In this whirlwind called life, you never know when a storm is gonna hit, or a bomb is gonna drop. But we've made it our one goal, to ride whatever wave comes, and ride it hard. Because life is too short to be anything but extreme, and nothing short of ridiculous.

Happy Anniversary to the love of my life <3 ........

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

If I was a season, I’d be Winter. Bitterly cold, but nothing compares to a winters day of staying indoors with cozy slippers and a cup of hot chocolate.

If I was a piece of furniture, I'd be a ridiculous abstract painting. Some people would look at me and think, psh, my daughter could paint that, but the true artists would find me amazing and fun.

If I was a country, I'd be Canada. Peaceful, inviting, self-sufficient, doesn't get in over her head, and doesn't pretend to have all the answers.

If I was a food, I'd be hot banana peppers. Fun only in brief spurts for some, but a keeper to the hardcores.

If I was a day, I'd be Friday. Because the trials of the week are almost over, and there's still lots to look forward to.

If I was a color, I'd be black. Because it has all the colors in one, yet doesn't need to flash that around.

If I was a letter, I’d be a letter of encouragement with no return address, just to let you know that I love the crap out of you, but don't necessarily want to hang out.

If I was a book, I'd be a complicated yet simple read, open to many different interpretations.

If I was a political leader, you would not want to vote for me, and I would not be offended.

If I was a drink, I'd be red wine. Bold, dry, classy, and makes you want to eat cheese.

If I was a man, I would be my husband, just so I could know what he really thinks and how he really feels.

If I could know the future, I would plug my ears and close my eyes, because I wouldn't want to know. Something tells me that if I could see it, I would probably run away, Thelma and Louise style.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

A smallish update:

Me:
-had an AMAZING first trip with my husband! We experienced many firsts together, and enjoyed each other very very much. I'm so thankful that God kept this trip hidden and protected, until His timing was perfect for us experience this trip together in such a way that made Him smile.
-feels like a fire has been reignited inside me, to seek after things that are real and raw, and to see their beauty, including the beauty within myself.
-missed my kids like CRAZY, and am so glad to be back home and in the role of mommy.
-miss my hubby while he's back at work, since the only time spent apart the whole trip was when one of us was on the potty.

Hub:
-the love of my life....
-back to work, while the sun is shinning and beckoning our skin to soak up its rays.... am trying not to distract him TOO much, by telling him of all the fun in the sun we're having, and how much I wish he was home, with me, in the sun, with a beer, in the hammock, but..... I'm failing miserably, by calling him and messaging him often, telling him all of the above.
-is an amazing MAN....that I am honored to call the man I married for my entire lifetime.

Precious girl:
-cried when we left, cried when we got back. We both ran into each others arms in tears, embracing each other when we were reunited after a long 9 days apart. The only thing missing was sappy background music that would bring tears to the eyes of those watching.
-won't stop telling me how much she missed me, and how she doesn't want to leave ever again, and I can't bring myself to tell her that I can't wait to go on my next trip.
-had a fabulous time with the nanny, eating foods she loves, and being the big helper.
-is home for the long weekend, and am VERY excited to spend it with her.
-is sporting her new Roxy shirt and Sketcher flip flops that we brought back for her with style and attitude, and will definitely be following in her mothers footsteps with a shopping addiction and love of brand name, and, this makes me secretly happy and blush at the same time.

The monkey:
-ran straight to daddy, yelled daddy over and over, and only wanted daddy, and still, only talks about daddy. He loves his daddy.
-spent the day in the sun with me, running through the sprinkler, tanning on the loungers, and eating freezies.
-loves all his new toys, especially his Superman cape.
-has been the cutest thing on the face on the planet and all I want to do is hug him and kiss him and call him George, and am realizing that spending a tiny bit of time away from the monkey, is actually a good thing.
-LOVED the nanny, did SO well, which obviously makes me happy, as I'm already planning our next trip in my head.

The nanny:
-was awesome with the kids, and left a lasting impression on both of them, as well as my family who has been ranting and raving about how awesome she was the whole week.
-cleaned my entire house top to bottom in time for our arrival, complete with a wedding invitation left on our dresser. She's getting married this August, and am crossing my fingers and praying to God that she doesn't get pregnant on her honeymoon, so she can continue to be our nanny for a long time.

Sunday, May 02, 2010

To my faithful readers, to my long lost blogger friends, I am still here. I can't count how many times I've sat down to write a post, only to get half way through and delete it. Lots of times I sit down with TONS to say, only to realize, either A: There are things that need to stay guarded, and I have a really hard time being vague, or B: I have no idea what I'm talking about anyway. I hope to push through this writers block, it's definately going to take some discipline, since I've been so absent for so long in this little area of my life.

My ant hill. It's a cozy little nook. Not much room to move around. When I feel like getting away from the chaos of life, well, there's really nowhere to go. It isn't exactly what I had in mind, when I used to dream of my future, but for now, I call it home. Downsizing from a spacious, multi-level home to this ant hill, has come with it's challenges. Some days I feel like packing my bags and hitting the road. But home is home.
Over the last year or so, God has been renovating in my heart. A massive de-junking. Sometimes after cleaning my fridge, I look inside and think, whoa, we have absolutely NO food. What once seemed full to the brim, is now completely bare, with only a few condiments and a jug of milk. It's then that I realize my full fridge, was actually full of old rotten expired, shit.
Looking at my heart, and seeing the dejunking process still continuing, I'm starting to wonder if ANYTHING will be left at the end of the day. If my entire foundation is being ripped up, what IS left?
For now?
Jesus loves me, and Jesus fights for me.
That's it.
That's all.
How long will I carry on with this one little nugget?
Until I get it.
So, with this one, single brick in my foundation, I build my home. It's small, and dirty. But I would rather live in a small little ant hill on a brick that will NEVER break, then a huge house built on a bunch of shit.
And THAT, is all I need to know, until my heavenly Father gives me the next brick.